Current Annoyances

[Dalty]

Bummer! Come stay with me. When I move house I will have room, I need Goiter to officially be the brains of the outfit plus Jubboiter will remember those that gave sanctuary and spare me when the ravaging begins.

[Jubbers]

Sweet! That is a thing I can do!

Another for you:

Percent = count / total count


Mind blown.

[Dalty]

I think I may have hemmorrhoids. Again.

However you fucking spell it.

Soothing wipes after poopy-time and Anusol suppositories at bedtime. Search your feelings....

[Dalty]

# First World Problems.

Vietnam Airlines overbooked the flight from Saigon to London next Monday so they just emailed me to try and bump me from Business to Economy. Bastards!

[Mal Shot First]

Don't you fucking let them do it, Dalty! You paid for those businesses class tickets, so you're going to damn well fly businesses class.

[Dalty]

All they have offered me is a refund of the difference between business and economy. Nothing additional to be a sweetener. No additional "bonus" airmiles. No voucher off future travel. Nothing. That's why I am a little pissed off.

Also, I am Vietnam Airlines/Skyteam Gold/Elite at the moment and will be Platinum/Elite Plus after this trip so frankly I am a little surprised to be asked!!

[The Swollen Goiter of God]

You mean all they've offered is to comp you what they actually owe you? The nerve!

You'd think they'd at least offer you a blowjob or a six-foot-tall chocolate Santa or a no-strings-attached lifetime enrollment in the Jelly of the Month Club.

On the other hand, you just got back hundreds of dollars. Go out and buy yourself a complete run of New Mutants, have a few nights out at a fancy steak house, and put whatever's toward bulking up your Blu-ray collection.

[Adam54]

Or just use the extra cash towards the cost of next week's vacation.

[The Swollen Goiter of God]

I bet I could stretch Dalty's comp cash into two or three vacations.

This is the opposite of a current annoyance, so it really shouldn't even be in this thread, but I came into forty bucks yesterday. I feel like a rich man. I don't feel Dalty rich, mind you, but I feel at least well-to-do podiatrist rich. I may buy a book or two. I might not even spend any of it on Jubbers or Jubboiter.

[The Swollen Goiter of God]

All right. Truth be told, I'll spend at least some of it on Jubbers. I took a Dr Pepper from her this morning, so I will comp her. It'll just be a bottle of Dr Pepper. No air miles or vouchers.

I hope Dr Pepper comps this family.

Even if it turns out the family is just Great-White-North-ing it, Dr Pepper should at least give them a soda for their troubles.

[Mal Shot First]

This is the opposite of a current annoyance, so it really shouldn't even be in this thread, but I came into forty bucks yesterday. I feel like a rich man. I don't feel Dalty rich, mind you, but I feel at least well-to-do podiatrist rich.

You could even say you're 1935-rich!

[Dalty]

You mean all they've offered is to comp you what they actually owe you? The nerve!

They want me to volunteer to give up my seat because they have over sold the plane then they have to make it worth my while.

[neglet]

Communists!

[The Swollen Goiter of God]

Current Annoyance
Jubboiter was a dead fish through a lot of the morning's dressing ritual. This slowed things down a bit. We were also delayed by some pretty heavy interstate traffic. I was late getting Jubboiter to school because of this.

The lateness meant finding a parking spot at Jubboiter's school was difficult. There were no openings in the usual places, but I did see one almost at the end of the road in front of her school, so I put my blinker on and positioned the car the way one positions a car to parallel park.

Unfortunately, the van behind me pulled up as I was backing in and honked at me. I gave the driver a second to back up so I could finish parking, but she just sat there. Luckily, a car at the very end of the road pulled out just as all this was happening, so I made sure my blinker never released (by which I mean I held it down so it wouldn't pop up when I turned the steering wheel in the opposite direction, just to keep my intentions clear), I drove up to the spot, and I pulled in. I say "luckily" because having to circle around again would have cost another five minutes.

I was annoyed at the car, but I was also in a real hurry. I was focused on getting Jubboiter inside. She's the typical autistic creature of habit, so I was doing my best to get her in her classroom before the breakfast trays came. If she'd come after they were out or in the middle of them coming out, there could have been dire consequences. It could have ruined her whole day and her teacher's whole day.

I should add that Jubboiter was bitten at school yesterday. The kid who bit her wasn't going for a warning bite. He clearly wanted to see blood and gore and guts and veins in his teeth. He broke the skin in three places, and there's still a sizable welt there today. This only made it more important to get Jubboiter in the classroom before the breakfast trays came out. I don't want her to hate school. It takes so little to set her off, and it can take weeks to get things back to normal.

While I was rushing to get Jubboiter out of the car, the van pulled up next to me, and the driver rolled down her window. "You never put your blinker on!" she said. Bullshit. My blinker was on the whole fucking time. It was probably on for a stretch of forty-five seconds to a minute. I glanced down nervously some five-to-ten times while I was trying to get in the first spot to confirm that it was on, since the lady pulled up while I was trying to back in.

"My blinker was on the whole time!" I said. I'm sure I sounded pretty short, but I didn't like her tone, and I don't like being told I didn't do something I know I did. It's usually pretty easy to cast doubt in my mind, but not in this case. I know I put the blinker on, and I know the icon was flashing for me inside the car. There's a slight chance there was some mechanical failure there, I guess, but it's a pretty new car, and the outer signal worked later on when I tested it.

Before the lady said anything, I was seriously just focused on cutting my losses and getting the kid in the building. Instead of just driving off (at this point, people were honking at the woman to move on), though, the woman kept on. "Well, I don't know if you put it on or not, but I didn't see it."

I said "It was on!" over my shoulder while trying to extract a frustratingly asleep Jubboiter from her seat. "Calm down, sir!" the lady said. "It's a Good Friday, sir!" the lady said.

First off, fuck your Good Friday shit, lady. Second off, Good Friday was a month ago. Do religious people just get to call every Friday "a Good Friday" if they want? Shit, man.

I wish she'd've just driven off. If she felt she just had to say something, maybe she could've said, "Sorry I didn't see your blinker."

I feel a little bad about being short with her, but she'd already been sort of nasty with her "You never put your blinker on!" line. I was in a rush and annoyed and dealing with a kid who was very likely going to erupt and spray forth molten autism the second she woke up, but it's not like I could explain all that to the woman.

Whatever. I should calm down. It's a Good Friday.

[Jubbers]

It's Friday the 13th. A lot of people would say, therefore, that it is impossible for it to be Good, especially Good with a capital G.

[The Swollen Goiter of God]

Some DJ on one of our stations claimed it was also going to be a full moon tonight, too, but it's not. DJs are dumb.

"DJs are dumb" wasn't meant to be an opening for Adam, but I'm open to it being an opening for Adam.

[Dalty]

Communists!

Damn straight!

[Dalty]

Maybe she has another years calendar in her house? Easter was kinda early this year!!

[Mal Shot First]

Current Annoyance
First off, fuck your Good Friday shit, lady. Second off, Good Friday was a month ago. Do religious people just get to call every Friday "a Good Friday" if they want? Shit, man.

Even going by the Julian calendar used by the Eastern Orthodox Church, it would not have been Good Friday. And even if it were Good Friday, why does she get to make you feel bad for not being pleasant toward her, but she can be totally unpleasant toward you? Maybe you should have replied with something like, "You calm down, lady. It's Good Friday."

Maybe she didn't mean it as Good Friday with a capital G. Maybe she just wanted you to stop ruining the good Friday she was having up to that point.

[Dalty]

Add her name to the list.

[Dalty]

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Nicotine spray right in the eye!! New pack so it's got a hair trigger. Just touched the top as I moved it into position to spray in my mouth and I got myself. Pain like nothing else. In the rooftop bar at the hotel too. Needed a bottle of water to rinse it asap!!! Worse pain than that time I cut chilli and accidentally maced myself!

Remember kids - Dalty does the fucking stupid stuff so you don't have to!

[Adam54]

Some DJ on one of our stations claimed it was also going to be a full moon tonight, too, but it's not. DJs are dumb.

"DJs are dumb" wasn't meant to be an opening for Adam, but I'm open to it being an opening for Adam.

Adam takes bait like that even more rarely than Fake Strider takes bait laid out for him.

[The Swollen Goiter of God]

Adam's the kind of guy who gets real sun. He doesn't go for tanner.

[Adam54]

Please. I'm West Minnesota, born and raised. Under no sun is how I spend most of my days.

[Dalty]

Every time you mention Minnesota I have to look at a map.